Agape Love
If you’re anything like me, the word agape probably sounds like a foreign language – and it is: Greek to be exact (pronounced ah-GAH-pay). I had never heard the word before, and I was so new to this idea of agape love until I surrounded myself with other believers during my walk with Christ and heard the word spoken over and over in all areas of the church. I heard friends say, “I want to walk with agape love,” or “I want to be able to show agape love”. But what does this really mean? After diving into the definition of agape love, I realized that I, too, wanted to live and show this type of love.
The first thing to know about agape love is that this type of love doesn’t refer to any type of romantic love, brotherly love, or even a feeling of love. Rather, this love is an act of unwavering faithfulness, goodwill, forgiveness, and empathy, regardless of reciprocity from others. When we think of our fellow brothers and sisters in Christ, it is easy to want to show them love and compassion, but we also need to show agape love to the ones who we may feel are undeserving of our love – even to the people that we have the most resentment and bitterness towards. This is reflected in 1 John 4:11-12 (ESV), “Beloved, if God so loved us, we also ought to love one another. No one has ever seen God; if we love one another, God abides in us and his love is perfected in us.” This highest form of intimacy can only be found if we walk in a relationship with Christ, know Him, and model the love that He has for us. This type of love can almost be compared to the “Golden Rule” as we learn in our elementary school days – to treat others as we want to be treated. But when we are younger, this rule is taught by being kind, sharing our toys, or speaking in a gentle tone. As we get older, we realize that the Golden Rule really is a way of transitioning us to the greatest commandment. Matthew 22:37-39 (ESV) recounts Jesus saying: “And he said to him, ‘“You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind. This is the great and first commandment. And a second is like it: You shall love your neighbor as yourself.’” So not only are we taught to treat others as we want to be treated, but the greatest commandment also tells us to love the Lord our God with all our heart, soul, and mind. By reminding us that the love we experience with God isn’t a superficial love, Jesus teaches us that this isn’t a love that wavers with favor and that this love requires us to show grace and willingness to sacrifice ourselves for the betterment of others.
Agape love isn’t an easy thing to accomplish, let alone even attempt. In fact, it’s downright unnatural for us as humans to want to show love to everyone, even to the ones whom we feel are undeserving. It’s not in our nature to love the unloved or to know what it means to truly love someone and be loved unconditionally. But when we walk with Christ, we are given a source of agape love and therefore can share that love with others. Romans 5:5 (ESV) says, “and hope does not put us to shame, because God’s love has been poured into our hearts through the Holy Spirit who has been given to us.” Jesus Christ is the ultimate example of agape love. This is most demonstrated by His sacrifice on the cross. This act of sacrifice wasn’t done with the intention of receiving anything in return. This was done purely out of love, regardless of any changing circumstances or feelings of obligation. The action itself of God sending His son to a broken world and to sacrifice Him for our salvation demonstrates agape love. His love surpasses all things, delivers us from the pain of our past, heals our hearts and souls, forgives, restores, and makes us whole.
It takes intentional work to show love to others no matter where we are in our spiritual journey. To be able to demonstrate our love through action doesn’t come easily, but we can do so in so many ways even during the mundane, everyday acts of life. With anything that you want to get better at, it takes hard work and practice. The same can be said for working to show others agape love. The work is worth the reward because we know that by showing love, we reflect who God is and the work He has done in our lives. Colossians 3:14-15 (ESV) says, “And above all these put on love, which binds everything together in perfect harmony. And let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, to which indeed you were called in one body. And be thankful.” We are called to be one body, and in order to fulfill that, we must love as Christ loves. God’s love is irreplaceable and incomparable to anything in and of this world. If we continue to strive towards loving one another instead of competing for each other’s love or limiting our love to those we feel are deserving of it, we can see the limitless love of our Father.
With all this being said, do not be discouraged when you are unable to show agape love to others. We can always try to love and accept others more, regardless of what a person says or does. Rather, we should be encouraged in knowing that the greatest form of love is shown to us by our Heavenly Father. He sees us as sons and daughters, no matter the mistakes we make, no matter how many times we reject and disobey Him, no matter how imperfect our words or actions are, and no matter how broken, disgusting, or traumatized we may feel. You are loved, and the love of the Lord never changes. Sit with that for a moment, and let that sink in. We all have our own versions of what love is to us, but we also have all experienced things like heartbreak, superficial love, relationships that fade, divided families, and estrangement. These are all occurrences in our worldly life, but to believe that our God, Creator of the Universe, will never turn our shortcomings into heartbreak or abandonment is truly an unimaginable gift. To know agape love is to know Christ, and to know Christ is to live out His law: to love one another as Christ has loved us (John 13:34, John 15:12). Remind yourself that as a son or daughter of God, we live in peace knowing that we are given the purest, truest agape love from our Father.